today is monday. monday is one of the worst things in the world. only thats okay, because today is actually tuesday and thats not so bad. not as bad as monday, which is one of the most terrible and worst things i have ever seen.
in that same light, i think its important to discuss what is going on with the economy. you see, when a lot of people are making money, its called "economics" and thats a good thing. when there are not as many people making as much money, that is also called "economics" but in a different way. in a bad way. and thats not good, thats bad.
in order for bad economics to become good economics (which would be good) its important for people to start making more money than they did at a previous time, but not so long ago that they were actually making more money. that would complicate things and cause confusion, which would likely lead to china taking the lead in the best country contest. that would be bad because people with black skin or white skin are universally thought to be better at olympic sports that people with not black skin or white skin. and the olympics is where you really find out who is better at what then someone else at something.
but back to the economy.
the economy lives in washington dc, and is roommates with the president. now lets not be ridiculous and start thinking of the economy of something that is physically alive, because its not. its not a human being. its more like a dog.
the economy is like a dog because if it got hit by a car and died, you would be sad for a little while but then would eventually forget that it ever existed because it doesnt have a soul and you cant actually really love something that isnt alive and doesnt have a soul. and im not saying that dogs arent alive. or that the economy isnt alive. because it is. they both are. but they dont have souls.
the economy is roommates with the president. naturally, they get into fights sometimes. like when the president eats the economys honey bunches of oats and doesnt replace it when he goes to kroger. or piggly wiggly. likely piggly wiggly.
when the president and the economy are in a fight, it is called an "economic downturn", and this can only be reversed when the economy and the president decide that its all good and they can stop being such fags all the time. right now the economy is being a total fag, and the president is all "dont you know that the word fag hurts people and you shouldnt use it?" and the economy is all "thats not fair, im not trying to be a dick to gay people, im just saying a word" and OMGBARACK!!!11!1 is like "yeah but still, you shouldnt say that word."
and until one of them stops being a total fag, the economy is going to continue to suffer in the lives of US americans who live in this country all over the world.
a good way for everyday people to help the economy is to keep in top physical shape. in order to accomplish this, its important to use proper judgement when living your life all the time. for instance, investing in a nicotine habit can only increase the amount of money you spend at gas stations, which in turn will cause gas stations to hire more ethnic indian type people who barely speak english, which in turn will cause more people to move here from indian type places, which will cause the population to go up, in turn creating more tax revenue for the US american form of government.
also, buying a goldfish probably wouldnt be a bad idea. the fish food market has been down in recent years, and many top business men who are drunks that sleep in the back of my office building are always talking about how this fine country of north america runs on the fish food industry. and you cant argue with logic like that.
so id say that we have a pretty good thing going here. its not even monday because its tuesday, and the president and economy are on the right track to figuring out a way to evenly split the electric bill because its not fair that they both pay the same amount when the economy uses way more electricity because of the two computers and flatscreen TV in his room.
plan a vacation with your kids!
in that same light, i think its important to discuss what is going on with the economy. you see, when a lot of people are making money, its called "economics" and thats a good thing. when there are not as many people making as much money, that is also called "economics" but in a different way. in a bad way. and thats not good, thats bad.
in order for bad economics to become good economics (which would be good) its important for people to start making more money than they did at a previous time, but not so long ago that they were actually making more money. that would complicate things and cause confusion, which would likely lead to china taking the lead in the best country contest. that would be bad because people with black skin or white skin are universally thought to be better at olympic sports that people with not black skin or white skin. and the olympics is where you really find out who is better at what then someone else at something.
but back to the economy.
the economy lives in washington dc, and is roommates with the president. now lets not be ridiculous and start thinking of the economy of something that is physically alive, because its not. its not a human being. its more like a dog.
the economy is like a dog because if it got hit by a car and died, you would be sad for a little while but then would eventually forget that it ever existed because it doesnt have a soul and you cant actually really love something that isnt alive and doesnt have a soul. and im not saying that dogs arent alive. or that the economy isnt alive. because it is. they both are. but they dont have souls.
the economy is roommates with the president. naturally, they get into fights sometimes. like when the president eats the economys honey bunches of oats and doesnt replace it when he goes to kroger. or piggly wiggly. likely piggly wiggly.
when the president and the economy are in a fight, it is called an "economic downturn", and this can only be reversed when the economy and the president decide that its all good and they can stop being such fags all the time. right now the economy is being a total fag, and the president is all "dont you know that the word fag hurts people and you shouldnt use it?" and the economy is all "thats not fair, im not trying to be a dick to gay people, im just saying a word" and OMGBARACK!!!11!1 is like "yeah but still, you shouldnt say that word."
and until one of them stops being a total fag, the economy is going to continue to suffer in the lives of US americans who live in this country all over the world.
a good way for everyday people to help the economy is to keep in top physical shape. in order to accomplish this, its important to use proper judgement when living your life all the time. for instance, investing in a nicotine habit can only increase the amount of money you spend at gas stations, which in turn will cause gas stations to hire more ethnic indian type people who barely speak english, which in turn will cause more people to move here from indian type places, which will cause the population to go up, in turn creating more tax revenue for the US american form of government.
also, buying a goldfish probably wouldnt be a bad idea. the fish food market has been down in recent years, and many top business men who are drunks that sleep in the back of my office building are always talking about how this fine country of north america runs on the fish food industry. and you cant argue with logic like that.
so id say that we have a pretty good thing going here. its not even monday because its tuesday, and the president and economy are on the right track to figuring out a way to evenly split the electric bill because its not fair that they both pay the same amount when the economy uses way more electricity because of the two computers and flatscreen TV in his room.
plan a vacation with your kids!
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